By Casey Grey
I have a bad habit of getting frustrated very quickly. Most people will not see this but those closest to me have definitely seen it. I am obviously aware of this habit and have become much better but it still happens from time to time. More often than I would like.
Although I could probably guess where I learned this habit as a child, it does not really matter where it came from. I'm more interested in figuring out how to replace it with a good habit so that I can be better to the people around me and myself.
The thing about habits is that they are often unconscious. We do them without realizing it and hopefully we catch ourselves before it's too late. It's a lot more difficult to get rid of a habit than it is to replace it. So what I can replace frustration with?
Actually, before I even get to that place, let's walk through some other things I noticed about my frustration.
When does it usually happen?
That last one is usually self inflicted. If I make a mistake and something takes more time than I feel it "should" have then I get quite frustrated with myself.
The great news about all this is that I can easily control the first two. Both of which are better for me anyways so it would be silly not to do them.
The third one is a little more difficult but if I handle the first two, it will be easier. For number three, I need to have a pattern interrupt in there. What can I do when I catch myself getting frustrated?
Or perhaps we can ask some logical questions about this pattern. Luckily I'm a male and logical thinking works well for me.
Has getting frustrated ever served me?
NO. Although I bet I have gotten frustrated or upset at people in the past and received what I wanted and now my brain has registered that.
Is there a better way I could have handled these situations?
YES. Coming from a loving, compassionate and empathetic space is always better.
Will I feel better when I prevent myself from getting frustrated and instead come from that loving space?
YES. Getting frustrated does not feel good nor is it good for my body. It also makes those around feel uncomfortable or angry towards me. Not only do I feel better but all those around me feel better.
What can I do when I catch myself getting frustrated?
Let's start with doing something silly. Something that will make me laugh. I will stick my finger up my nose and start talking in a stupid voice about the thing I'm frustrated about so I can realize how ridiculous it is. This is a trick I learned at Unleash the Power Within and it's time to put it to use again.
How will I make sure I get better at this? I will ask those around me to read this and call me out when I get frustrated so that I have to stick my finger up my nose in front of them.
If you see me getting frustrated, call me out!
What habits do you have that are no longer serving you? What are you going to do about them?