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By Casey Grey
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---WARNING--- This post (and all future posts) will be very different than previous posts ;) If you're from Canada, you may remember the Freedom 55 ad campaigns. The insurance company running the ads was attempting to alert Canadians what it would take to retire by the age of 55. I remember seeing those ads and saying to myself "freedom 35 is what I'm aiming for!"
Things started off well and in my young naive mind I was well on my way. I started my career at the young age of 17. I met my beautiful wife, Natasha, at the age of 19. I bought my first house at 20. I proposed to Natasha at 21. I bought a second house at 23. I started my business at 24 while Natasha was doing her Masters in clinical psychology. Natasha and I got married and started building our dream home at 26. We had our son when I was 27. Life was looking good! At least from the outside... Although I looked successful on the outside, I did not feel successful. Debt was pilling up and every day I felt more and more like a slave. Freedom 35 was no longer in site and once I turned 35 we were right in the thick of the pandemic and not only was I not financially free, I was now locked down as well. We had to close down another business we had started and the debt spiral continued. I was on my knees but trying to hide it from my wife. There was no need for both of us to be stressed so I carried the burden myself. So let's back up a little. What is freedom? For me it was doing what I want, when I want, wherever I want, with whoever I want, however I want. That's the financial freedom the world is trying to sell to us everyday. I remember being at a personal development event that was held by a very well know person. There were hundreds of people there. At one point in the event, all the men, including me, were yelling freedom. The music was blasting and the ground was shaking. It was a powerful experience. It was like the men yelling "FREEDOM" in the Braveheart movie and running into war. I came out of that event on fire but it did not last very long. What I have come to know is the freedom I was chasing is not freedom at all. It's a trick. It's a lie. It's a trap. As long as your freedom is tied to some "thing", you are always trying to get more or you are trying to hold on to what you have because once you loose that thing, you will loose your freedom. True freedom can never be lost once you have it. True freedom lifts you of the burdens you are carrying on your shoulders. True freedom is not achieved, it is received. How do I know this to be true? I am experiencing it in my life right now. I can honestly say that I feel more free today than I did yesterday, last month or last year. My freedom grows every single day no matter what happens in my life. How did I receive this freedom? I made one simple decision. A commitment that changed my life. The last blog post I wrote was about surrendering. I know in my heart that I had to surrender. To let go of the control. I had one thing wrong though. I was surrendering to the wrong thing. The decision that changed my life was to surrender and commit my life to Jesus. If you're an atheist or don't believe in Jesus, don't stop reading yet. That's what the enemy wants you to do. I know exactly where you're at because I was there before as well. Just a couple more minutes. I promise the end will be worth it. I remember saying when I was a kid, "I wish there was a a guide the life." The truth is that there is and it's called the Bible. It's not some religious book like I originally thought. The more I study it and the more I put the things I learn into practice, the better my life gets and the more free I become. Now don't get me wrong. This is not some prosperity thing. I still have to deal with all sorts of struggles, pains and so-called bad things. The difference is that I'm free from the burden of carrying all those burdens on my shoulders all by myself. God will carry as much as I want to give him and I'm giving him more and more every day. I'm no longer a slave. I'm not a slave to money. I'm not a slave to stuff. I'm not a slave to my business. I'm not a slave to anybody. I'm a servant of God and servants are cared and provided for. If I'm a servant, I'm not in control though? How is that freedom? If you're trying to control everything in your life, how's it going for you? If it's anything like my life, probably not very well. Control does not equal freedom. If it did, once you lost control, you would loose your freedom. Which I'm guessing happens every day. The truth is that God's plan is always going to be better than our plans. We just have to get out of our own way, surrender and commit to Him. I know this to be true because He was working in my life before I believed in Him. Remember that freedom 35 dream I had? I achieved it and I didn't even realize it until I sat down to write this. The reason I wrote this is because Pastor Doug Millar asked me to share my testimony at church after sharing a little bit of my story with him. I achieved freedom 35 because at the age of 35 is when I decided to surrender and commit my life to Jesus. God's plan was way better than my plan (and I can share dozens of stories proving this). If you have read this through to the end, I'm guessing you're either already a believer or you're searching for something. If you're searching, I'm praying for you. I'm praying you see the light and start the feel the freedom that I now have. You are one decision away from freedom. All you need to do is accept Jesus into your life. If you're not sure how to do that, please reach out to me. We can do it together. If you want to watch the testimony I shared at church, you can watch it here. It's around the 15:30 mark of the video. The law of attraction states that everything that we are experiencing, have experienced or will experience has been attracted to our lives by our own doing.
Personally, I believe in this. And if you're reading this, I'm guessing that you believe it or some part of you believes it to be true. Like most things in life though, it's easy to take credit for the positive stuff. When you get that promotion, land a new client or finally get that date with the person of your dreams, you can say "I did this!" But what about the negative stuff. Are you taking credit for that? Or are you blaming external factors? Thanks to Grant Cardone's The 10X Rule, I have come to realize, yet again, the power of words. I often say that things are happening FOR me but he has flipped that around to things are happening BECAUSE OF me. That simple change of words creates a radical shift in mindset. All of a sudden I am taking radical responsibility for everything that happens in my life. Yes, I know most things in life are out of my control but that does not mean I have to relinquish responsibility. We are responsible for our own lives. If shit's not working out or you're not happy with your current situation, that's on you and nobody else. I love where life brings you if you allow it to flow.
Yesterday I found myself sitting beside my brother and across from two Monks. We were one of four contractors being interviewed for the new Dhamma Hall that the Monks will be building. Although I was not nervous about the interview as I have no issues talking about construction and our experience, I did feel a little intimidated when I sat down. I know these people would be the last people to judge us but it was intimidating sitting across from these men. It was interesting to witness myself in the situation. Intimidation is not something I would have ever associated with a Monk. But here I was feeling it... So why the feeling? What was I afraid of? How did they intimidate me? If I'm honest with myself, I believe I may have felt like a fraud. I felt as though they have figured out this thing called life and here I am still trying to figure it out. I just have to do what they do, right? But there's no way I could do what they do. At least not right now. I love what I do. I love my wife. I love my son. I love the path I'm on. Why does it have to be their path? It doesn't. We all have our own paths. They all start the same way and end the same way (birth and death) but what happens in between will always be different. No two people will ever have the same path. Some things are easy to measure and track.
If you have decided to begin playing the piano, it's easy to see your progress. If you play baseball, it's easy to follow your stats and see the areas that are changing. If you lift weights, it's easy to track if you are getting stronger. If you invest your money, you can see it go up and down. But what about things like your emotional strength? Or your parenting skills? Or your character? Or your leadership skills? Or your relationship with your spouse. Often, the things that are most important are the hardest to track and since we can't track them we don't give them the attention they need. Tracking is important, especially in business, but it's not everything. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “What you are stands over you the while, and thunders so that I cannot hear what you say to the contrary.”
What you do is more important than what you say. People are watching your feet, not your mouth. However you want to put it, your actions will always speak louder than your words. It's a principle that strands true. It cannot change. We've all been tricked by the slick fast talker (I'll admit that I have). Deep down we always knew we were being tricked but we let our head make the decision. Although the words you use are important, what comes before and after those words will always be more important. The truth will always prevail. How do you see the world?
Do you believe people are nice and that the world is a good place or do you see destruction and all the evil in the world? Do you believe kids are the greatest joy in the world or a nuisance because they make too much noise and wreck your front lawn? Do you see opportunities all around the world or problems that are too big to solve? Do you travel through the world struggling at every turn or having fun like it's a game? We don't see the world as it is. We see the world how we are. If you want to change the world, change yourself. How do you define success?
Money? Freedom? Relationships? Health? Spirituality? All of the above? Is success something you get or something you feel? If other people believe your are successful, does that make you successful? The ONLY way you will ever FEEL successful is if you are fulfilled and the only way to be fulfilled is to do what you want to do. Happy Monday! I hope you're doing what you love. If you're not, I hope you're putting a plan into place to make it happen. If you're not, that's on you... I'm guilty of putting more on my plate than I can eat, figuratively speaking. I pack as much as possible into my days, weeks and months and inevitably most things do not get accomplished. But I do get A LOT accomplished and I definitely get the most IMPORTANT things accomplished.
As part of this habit (good or bad is TBD), I often leave things to the last minute and cram everything into a short period of time. This works in a lot of cases (like cramming before an exam) but it only works for "man-made" systems. For things that follow natural law, it will NEVER work. In re-reading the The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, I came across the following: "Did you ever consider how ridiculous it would be to try to cram on a farm—to forget to plant in the spring, play all summer and then cram in the fall to bring in the harvest? The farm is a natural system. The price must be paid and the process followed. You always reap what you sow; there is no shortcut." For the most important things in life, the things that follow a natural process, there is no shortcut (or in today's words, there is no hack). Instead of looking for the hack, learn and follow the process. If followed properly, it WILL work and it is much more fulfilling. You are what you think.
Or are you? I have a lot of "thoughts" come through my mind but I'm NOT my thoughts. Perhaps you are what you think about most. That could be true. The more you think about something, the higher the chance of attracting it into your life. If you often think about being sick, I bet you are sick quite often. If you often think about having lots of money, I bet you have lots of money. On the flip side, if you often think about how you don't have money, I bet you don't have much money. If you often think about being fit, I bet you're in pretty good shape. Whatever it is that you think about most of the time is likely showing itself in your life. Partly because what you think about most, you start to believe. That means you are what you think AND believe. So, if you want to change your life, change what you think about most. Change your beliefs. Did the dog bite Johnny or did Johnny bite the dog?
Did you drill the screw or screw the drill? Are you a body with a spirit or a spirit with a body? Same words in a different order gives you a different outcome. Sometimes you don't need to change what you are doing. You just need to change the order in which you do it. |
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