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By Casey Grey
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I had a great call with two amazing men yesterday, Ken Eslick Jr. and Alan Murray. These two guys are out to serve! They always deliver on what they say and are happy to support in any way they can.
The conversation yesterday went to relationships. We all shared experiences and wisdom as to what we've learned and what we continue to learn within our relationships with our wives. One of the reasons this was such a powerful conversation was because not only have we all been with our women for an extended period of time but we also work with them. Having a relationship is easy but having a GREAT relationship takes a lot of work. Throwing business into the mix only adds complexity. I shared some stuff that has been working for myself such as understanding the importance that hormones play in a relationship. Understanding what produces testosterone and what produces estrogen has really helped me. This is something I learned from Beyond Mars and Venus. Men need 10 times more testosterone than women and women need 10 times more estrogen than men. As an example, listening produces testosterone and talking produces estrogen (God knew what he was doing when he created us). Other testosterone building activities are driving, making money, sports and solving problems. Does that sound like a man to you? Alan shared a rule that has worked really well for him and his wife. No business talk after 8:00pm. Simple yet powerful for couples who work together. It's easy to talk about work and all the things you "have" to do tomorrow or things that came up during the day. But when do you check in with each other? Men, when do you ask your wives questions and just listen to what she needs to say? (Without trying to fix anything I should add...) Ken had something great that has stuck with him over the years:
This can be a vicious cycle. If a woman feels unsafe, unheard or unseed, there's a good chance they will be critical, controlling and/or closed towards their man. And if a man feels like their woman is being critical, controlling or closed off to him, he will likely not see her, hear her or make her feel very safe. The things above are simple but they're not easy. Great relationships require more work on ourselves than anything else. Yes, they can be painful but they can also be the greatest joy in the world. What's the point of doing anything if you can't share it with somebody? (And I could not imagine sharing my life with anybody other than Natasha Grey.) Thank you, Ken and Alan, for your wisdom. It's already being put into practice! Comments are closed.
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