"There's not enough hours in a day."

I have said this many times.

Is that really true?

No matter who you are or where you are in the world, we all get 24 hours in a day (with exception to those daylight savings time days, for those technical people).

So why is it that some people seem to accomplish more in a day (or a week, or a month or a year) than others?

It can't be because they have more time...

But we're getting ahead of ourselves. There is a more important question...

What is it you would like to accomplish?

You can either spend your time trying to keep the filters from getting too dirty or spend your time replacing the filters after.

Similarly, for your mind, you can spend your time avoiding situations that affect your mindset or take the time to clear your mind after.

It's up to you to decide where you want to put your efforts in.

I don't believe it's one or the other.

Life is never black or white.

There's value in being diligent but there's also value in being flexible.

At my son's 6 year old birthday party, I could have spent my time hosing the kids off before they jumped in and out of the hot tub. Instead, I chose to let them have fun which allowed me to have more fun as well.

The filter needed to be changed anyways...

Planning is important. It set things in motion.

​It tells your brain "this is what I need to accomplish."

What I have learned about planning though is that plans rarely go as planned.

If you need to get to Toronto from Ottawa, it does not matter how you get there as long as you get there.

But you will never get there if you don't start planning.

Detours may happen. Traffic may slow you down. The weather may affect your trip. Your kids may need to stop 6 times for bathroom breaks. Many things may happen but you will never be able to predict everything.

The key is to be flexible but focused.

Flexible enough to adapt when required.

Focused enough to make sure you are still heading in the right direction.

If you follow my Instagram stories, you have seen that I've been having issues with my 1977 VW Van.

Three times now, my mechanic has called me and said the van was ready to go and three times I have picked it up and ran into issues.

The first time I died in my neighbourhood before heading out of town (thankfully).

The second time I died in the middle lane of the 417 during rush hour (good advertising for The Conscious Builder since the logos are on the van...).

The third time, yesterday, I died at a red light but got it going again and was able to get it back to the shop.

Is it frustrating?

Yes.

Am I upset with my mechanic?

No.

I knew what I was signing up for when I purchased the 43 year old vehicle.

Being a business owner myself, I also know what it's like to be the business owner on the other side of situations like this. My mechanic is likely more upset and frustrated than I am. If I were to get upset and frustrated at him, it would only make the situation worse.

In keeping my cool and being empathetic, he is returning the favour and is happy to go the extra mile.

When I rolled up yesterday with the issues, he dropped everything and worked on the van for an hour and a half to get me going so I could get to the Manotick Car Show. He found a couple more issues so he knew I would be bringing it back after but he did what he could in the short time frame.

I should also add that he did not charge me for the previous visit and parts required.

We often talk about the importance of being great business owners and delivering unbelievable service and value but we downplay the importance of being a great customer.

If you deal with a business who gives you shitty service, being a great customer will not get you better service.

On the flip side, if you deal with a business who delivers great service, they will deliver unbelievable service to the great customers.

​They see the value in the relationship as oppose to the transaction.

Never underestimate the power of being a great customer. You may just get more than what you're asking for.

(FYI, my mechanic is Ron Cashman. I would link his website but he's oldschool and does not have a website. Shoot me a message if you need a good VW mechanic.)

We like to believe that we make calculated, logical and rational decisions. In reality, they are full of all sorts of emotions.

Why do you buy the Mercedes over the Kia?

Why do you buy the electric car over the gas or the diesel car?

Why do you buy the $50 purse versus the $500 purse or the $5,000 purse?

Why do you live in a condo versus a house or vice versa?

Why did you start your business?

Why haven't you started your business?

Why do you meet in person versus over the phone?

Why did you watch the action movie over the love story?

Why did you put in the high end kitchen over the Ikea kitchen?

Why did you choose the steak over the salad?

There are plenty of arguments for each one of these decisions. Does that mean there is a right decision and a wrong decision?

If we're honest with ourselves, we will make our decisions and then rationalize them in our own minds.

Right or wrong is just a point of view.

But keep in mind that a point of view from somebody who has more experience than you may be worth considering.

Personally, I love change.

I love the variety.

I get bored with the same thing all the time.

It's both a gift and a curse.

I find that most people are afraid of change which holds them back. They are afraid to make the leap. They are afraid of what's on the other side. They are too comfortable where they are.

That being said, there are some things I would never want to change, like my wife (I love you sweetie). But, our relationship has changed over the years. It is very different now than it was when we were in our twenties with no kids and no businesses. We have evolved as a couple. We have grown together. We have changed together.

I think it's important to understand where change can be impactful for YOU.

Changing your underwear is important.

Changing your spouse on the other hand... Well, that's for you to decide. The question I have for the person who is thinking about that is "Does your spouse make you a better person?"

Changing the filter in your furnace is important.

Changing the direction of your business... That, once again, is for you to decide. Sometimes change is good. Other times you need to Lean In and just commit.

And that's the advice I received from a mentor of mine, Rock Thomas, not long before we decided to change the direction of the podcast (which is now Lean in with Casey Grey).

And once we started the new podcast, my producer, Brian, and I had conversations around the format of the podcast. Brian has some great ideas which require more work but he's excited to lean in and commit to it.

New Podcast. New Format.

Change is good :)

Yesterday was the first episode with the new format and I love the change! When I interviewed Tarek Mounib of Free Trip to Egypt, we were not planning for the new format but Brian worked his magic.

You can listen to Tarek's episode on Apple Podcasts or Google Play Music.

​Enjoy!

All of these things are required at some point. Whether it's your house, your car, your business, your relationship, your health, your mindset or your life.

Sometimes you need a quick fix to get to the finish line or make your destination.

However, that quick fix is often just a bandaid for what really requires a quality repair and would need to be addressed later.

Maintenance, on the other hand, can often avoid the need for quick fixes and quality repairs.

The key is to know when you need each of these items.

For life, I believe there are a few regular maintenance items we should all be doing, just like fluid changes on our cars.

• Writing
• Meditating
• Exercising
• Sleeping
• Healthy Eating

Do these 5 things daily, or even weekly, and let me know how your life improves.

Not sure how to start? Pick one to focus on this month, turn it into a habit and then start the next one. If you do none of them right now, it will be too painful to do all of them at once.

If you need resources for inspiration, motivation or accountability, here are a few items that have helped me:​

Writing:
Hopefully this blog is inspiring you, however, I pulled my inspiration to start this blog from Seth Godin's Blog.

Meditation:
When I meditate at home, I like to use Calm but have also used Headspace. For a deeper experience, if you are in Ottawa, I recommend you swing by Younion.

Exercising:
For myself, I tried many things but have realized that I need accountability to stay on track for exercise. Right now I'm doing adult gymnastics courses with Alex Kazam Gymnastics. 

Sleeping:
The Power of When is the best book I have read on understanding sleep and you can also check out The Power of When Quiz.

Healthy Eating:
There are plenty of books, blogs and podcasts out there and I believe you need to find what works for you. As a rule of thumb though, if it comes in a box or is made in a box (factory) it's likely not healthy for you.

I've done a lot of personal development over the past decade.

I'm always doing my best to be better than I was yesterday.

Am I always better than I was yesterday? Definitely not! I'm far from perfect.

I've done numerous events, read dozens of books and listened to hundreds of podcasts.

The issue I find with listening and doing all of these things is that I feel like I need to act on all these new ideas right away. I feel like I need to work on my weaknesses.

What has become very apparent to me over the past year is that I need to stop focusing on my weaknesses and focus the majority of my time on my strengths.

There's a reason they are my strengths. My strengths are who I am naturally. Why would I want to try and be somebody I'm not?

The best personality test (if that's what you want to call it) I have done is CliftonStrengths 34® which was recommend to me by Matthew Britt.

It pulls out your top 10 strengths with the most emphasis put on your top 5. The goal is to find a way to focus the majority of your time in areas where you can use these strengths.

My top 5 are:

1. Achiever
2. Self-Assurance
3. Connectedness
4. Activator
5. Maximizer

Alone, those did not mean much. When I read the descriptions, it nailed me. I felt like it knew exactly who I was.

To go a little deeper, of the 34 strengths that you could have, they are put into 4 categories:

1. Influencing
2. Executing
3. Strategic Thinking
4. Relationship Building

The order that you see above is the order that my strengths come in at.

The reason I thought these results and this information to be so powerful is because this is what I needed to give myself permission to just be me.

One of the things I have struggled with over my life is building deep relationships. Sure, I know a lot of people but anybody can do that by putting themselves out there. This has been nagging at the back of my mind because I hear so many people talk about how important relationships are and how you need to cultivate and nurture them.

But this is not me...

Yes, Connectedness is one of my top 5 strengths which is part of the Relationship Building category but this essentially is the belief that we are all one, which I firmly believe. This is likely why I feel bad when I squish a bug...

"So what are you saying, Casey? Does this give you permission to be an asshole? Are you just going to ignore all your relationships?"

Heck no! It's the opposite. I know we're all connected so I will do everything I can to help and the best way I can help is to focus on my strengths.

I'm likely not going to send you a text message to see how you're doing (unless you are my wife) but I will happily write this blog post.

Will I ignore messages that come my way? Absolutely not! But they may not be long responses.

I love to work. I like to get shit done. I enjoy seeing people succeed. I want to help as many people as possible.

That's who I am. And I'm proud of it.

In conclusion, I would highly recommend doing the quiz if you're interested in understanding yourself more. My wife did it as well so I could understand her more and I have asked my business partners to do it.

FYI, Gallup is not paying me anything to promote this. I just want to share something that has significantly helped me. They do have an example on the website but you can download my results here if you're interested:

Disagreements are not fun.

Unless you are a lawyer who makes your living on people who have trouble agreeing, it's likely not something you look forward to.

But what if you looked at disagreements differently?

What if each disagreement was an opportunity?

An opportunity to learn.

An opportunity to learn about the subject you are disagreeing on as well as an opportunity to learn more about the person you are disagreeing with.

Disagreements give you insight, knowledge and wisdom.

If everybody agreed all the time, how would that affect our world?

I bet we would get bored pretty quickly since we would already know everything and there were be nothing new for us to learn.

Relationships do not come without disagreements.

If you expect to never disagree with your business partner, your spouse, your kids or your co-workers, you are living in a fantasy world. A fantasy world I would not like to be a part of.

The way to measure the quality of a relationship is how it is at the end of the disagreement. Is it stronger or weaker?

If you have a relationship that never has a disagreement, you may want to look at it closely. It may not be healthy and you may be missing something quite important...

Speaking about disagreements, this weeks podcast episode on Lean In features Tarek Mounib of the newly released documentary, Free Trip To Egypt. The whole basis of the movie is based around disagreements. The episode will be released on Thursday. If you have not subscribed to the podcast yet, you can do so on Apple Podcasts or Google Play Music.

Is there somebody in your life who constantly disappoints you?

Perhaps it's not the person.

Perhaps you have unrealistic expectations for that person.

Perhaps you are expecting them to behave in a way they have never behaved before or deliver on something they have never delivered on before.

You are expecting them to be different than who they have proven themselves to be in the past.

If you don't want to be disappointed, get rid of your expectations.

People do not disappoint. Having expectations is what leads to disappointment.